Dating and Engagement

I have gotten  a lot of inquiries about the recent development between Jake and my relationship. It has happened all very suddenly, and many people have excitedly demanded "give me the details!" Jake told several of his siblings and family members our story, but I feel men aren't extremely great at detail, so I've decided to share our story from my point of view and with as much detail as possible. Hopefully this will satisfy everyone's curiosity. ;-)

Jake and I have been neighbors since the beginning of the school year (August 2008). It's actually an interesting story how I came to be at Garden Court (my apartment now). Back in March 2008, I was looking for housing for the fall semester and was just going to stay at the place I was currently living (Old Farm). I even paid my deposit and everything! Something didn't feel quite right, however, and I ended up applying for an apartment in Garden Court. I was put on a waiting list and was told it was already full. A few days later I received a call from the manager telling me there was a private room available in Apart. #1. I became roommates with Alli Cope and Anamarie Lamb, and because the three of us were so much fun, Jake started coming over to our apartment and practically took up residence as our 7th roommate. Needless to say we got to know each other very well. (A little too well I think. :-))

Jake tells me that about the beginning of February was when he started liking me. He told me he loved being with all three of us (Alli, Anamarie, and me), but when he came over he wanted me to be there, and he missed me when he wasn't with us. (I thought that was so sweet!) I tend to be a little dense when it comes to noticing boys' advances, and I didn't think anything about Jake staying later to talk to me on our love sac night after night, or asking me to go to his friends house for dinner one Sunday evening, and then to Alan and Whitney's for the next Saturday. Jake said he was showing all kinds of signs that he liked me, and everyone apparently noticed it except me. It should have been obvious to me when he volunteered to accompany my roommates and I to the hotel my parents were staying at for Parent's Day and spend the rest of the night having a "girl's night" party with all of us. 

The following Monday after our dinner date, I received a text message from Anamarie telling me that "boy did she have some news for me about Jake!" and I needed to call her when I got out of class. When I called and talked to her, she said she couldn't tell me what had happened unless Alli said it was alright. I started to panic a little when I called Alli and she responded hesitantly to my inquiry, saying she would talk to me when she got home. "What in the world is going on?!" was the thought racing around my mind. Words cannot really describe my thoughts when, upon returning home for lunch, Alli proceeded to tell me Jake had asked to talk to Anamarie, sat on our living room couch, and told her he was considering dating me, asking her for all sorts of insider information. (The little traitor!)

I was speechless. That was the last thing I was expecting. I had so many thoughts race through my mind. My biggest concern was that I had a missionary out who was coming home in May, and I didn't think it would be fair to date Jake for a few months while I was planning on dating my missionary when he got home. My mind was set on seeing what would happen with my missionary. It's funny how God works, and several things happened the next few days in order for me to have a change of heart. I started really praying to know what I should do, and after Jake and my date to Alan and Whitney's (which was really fun), we went for a drive. We drove around for about an hour looking at cool houses in Logan, and then we stopped to fill up Jake's car with gas. Once the car was filled and we were on our way again, I could tell Jake was nervous about something because he just sat there waiting at a green light. I said, "Uh, Jake it's green. Green means go." and he mumbled, "It's hard to talk and drive at the same time." I just laughed and said, "You weren't even talking!" He was quiet for a minute, then said, "Shannon, I like you, and I want to date you. I'm 25 and not getting any younger, so I'm dating to get married. Anamarie told me you're waiting for a missionary, and I told myself I was never going to date anyone who has a missionary again because I don't want to date someone who already has half their heart given away to someone else. So I need to know how serious you are about your missionary." 

Talk about being upfront and forward! I was stunned. Not so much by the fact we were having this conversation, because Anamarie warned me it was coming, but by the way he did it. There was no beating around the bush at all! It was a this-is-how-it-is-and-I-need-an-answer-now type of a thing. I took a minute to collect my thoughts, pray for guidance, and really think deeply about how I felt. Then I just went with my feeling. I told Jake my missionary and I had been very serious and I was, at the time, waiting for him to come home to see what would happen. I wanted to date my missionary and see where things would go. I also told him I was going with what felt right, and dating Jake right then felt right, but it was up to Jake whether or not he wanted to pursue this relationship knowing what I just told him. I held my breath, hoping he would say we should date, but thinking he probably wouldn't want to take the chance. He took a deep breath and said, "Ok, if we're going to date there are some things you need to know about me being in the military..." While Jake talked and filled me in on the difficulties of being a military man's girlfriend, I felt the most amazing warm feeling fill my chest, and I knew this was right. 

Jake walked me back to my apartment and we both stood there awkwardly because we didn't know how to transition from being friends to dating. After he left, I went into my room and started to panic. What was I doing getting into a relationship right now? Was this the right thing? I prayed really hard to have no doubts about this, and in church the next day sitting next to Jake, I had the most powerful feeling that this was what I needed to be doing. Since we were neighbors we spent almost every hour together, and it was Spring Break that week which was a big plus. We went tubing, snowmobiling, and watched movies, talking until 4:00am (it was ok because he hadn't even kissed me yet) about anything and everything. We got to know each other so much better, and we both feel that without Spring Break, our relationship would be on a lower level than it is right now. He did finally kiss me Tuesday night (which was really Wednesday morning) before I left for home. It was a good thing because I don't know how much longer I could have waited for him to take charge before I kissed him first myself! 

After the week of Spring Break, I knew I needed to make a decision about Jake and my missionary. It wasn't fair to be dating Jake while waiting for my missionary, and I was starting to have some pretty strong feelings for Jake. The Sunday after we started dating, March 15th, I made the decision to see where dating Jake would lead and not date my missionary in May. It was a hard decision, but I felt it was right, and I took off the promise ring my missionary had given me before he left and took down the countdown poster. I prayed for confirmation I was doing the right thing, and felt impressed to say, "I'm going to marry Jake." I immediately felt the same warm, powerful feeling I had before and I knew I was given my answer. Now all I had to do was wait for Jake to feel the same. 

On Monday night I told Jake I took my ring off and was only going to date him. Needless to say he was extremely happy with this turn of events and rewarded me for my decision. ;-) 

I called my mom on Tuesday and told her I was going to marry Jake. She reacted better than I thought she would. She didn't even question my decision. She asked me why I wanted to marry Jake. I started telling her about how great of a leader he was and how nice and smart and handsome....she abruptly cut me off and said, "Shannon, I don't care about all that stuff! Does he make your heart pitter-patter? Do you just want to be with him all the time? You are too logical! Is your heart telling you he is what you want?!" I laughed really hard at that! Leave it to my mom t0 put me in my place. (And yes to all of those questions.)

Jake and I went to the Draper temple dedication on Sunday March 22nd, and while they were showing the bride and sealing rooms, I thought to myself, "I really want Jake to take me there." Later that night Jake and I were talking and I asked him what he was thinking. After a moments hesitation he responded, "If we keep dating like this we're eventually going to get married." I immediately said, "I already know I'm going to marry you." What? Why on earth did I just say that?! It just popped out! Jake sat up and said with a bewildered look, " What did you just say?" I was super embarrassed and didn't want to tell him again, but he demanded it. Jake said he had been thinking about marrying me but didn't want to scare me away because we had only been dating for 2 weeks. He also told me that during the temple dedication while they were showing the sealing room he had the thought that he wanted to take me there. Coincidence? I don't think so. I asked him if he really wanted to marry me, and I absolutely loved his response! He said, "I have never wanted anything so bad in my life." 

We went ring shopping the following Wednesday, and I already knew what I wanted because I had gone by myself the day before. I was just so excited I could hardly stand it! We picked out the ring and I told Jake he had better propose to me in an amazing way because I would have to tell everyone this remarkable proposal story for the rest of my life. He got the hint. :-) I called the temple and scheduled the day and time, and Jake came and asked my dad if he could marry me. My dad was beaming about Jake the rest of the weekend. My parents definitely approved. Everything was set, all I was waiting for was the ring...